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  Santa Cruz Parent Santa Cruz County

July 11, 2019
Friends

Ask Nicole: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Friendships

Junior Rangers

Rangers Galore!

Emergency Planning
Fun Events!
Click to view our Business Directory
  Friends

(0 A July 2019) Friendship_Carnegie.jpgWe are enriched with the friends in our lives --close friends, potential friends, friends from preschool, grammar, middle, high school, college, work, neighborhoods, churches, even Facebook groups. Friends include our brothers, sisters, children, cousins, parent, etc. I recently connected with a cousin I hadn't seen for 40 years. We picked right up with shared memories and interests. What a joy! Yesterday I laughed and cried watching Steel Magnolia, a beautiful story of the strength of friendships among women in a small southern town. I've recently witnessed the tender friendship of a couple in their senior years. Beautiful!

Nicole writes about how to help our children with the ebb and flow of friendships. Her article caused me to recall the classic Dale Carnegie book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Carnegie's daughter, Donna Dale Carnegie, has written a book How to Win Friends and Influence People for Teen Girls. Next I recalled the delightful, tumultuous, inspiring friendship of Anne and Diana in Anne of Green Gables. Helping our children develop friendship skills is good for them, us, the community and the world!

Please share our newsletter with new friends so they won't miss a few tidbits of wisdom from our author contributors, and as always our many fun events!

Have a wonderful weekend with family and friends!  Parmalee

 

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  Ask Nicole: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Friendships

(0 A July 2019) FriendsYoungGirls.jpgBy Nicole M. Young, MSW

When my kids were little, their closest friends were the children of my closest friends. Life was simple when I knew and trusted their friends and their friends' parents. Now, my kids mention friends I've never met before, and I know that friendships can begin and end on social media without ever having any face-to-face interactions. It almost makes me miss the "simpler" days of my childhood when social groups changed only as fast as you could dial the phone or write a note on paper. Although life feels more complicated these days, I have to remember I'm doing my best to teach my kids tools to handle the ups and downs of their social relationships - and then trust they'll be able to use those tools when the time comes.

Dear Nicole, My 12-year old daughter has been spending a lot of time alone lately. Her usual group of friends has become more interested in social media, shopping, and watching YouTube videos (and who knows what else) - and my daughter isn't interested in any of that. It doesn't seem to bother her to be alone, but I haven't heard her talk about making new friends either. Should I be worried? Jamila

Dear Jamila, That's a good question, and it's important that you're noticing changes in your daughter's social life. As kids grow older, their social groups often change as they develop different interests and meet new people. It's possible that your daughter naturally grew apart from her usual group of friends, and it may just take time to form new friendships. Or, this change could be a sign that something else is going on and your daughter could use support. Here are some tips to try:

Have a casual conversation with your daughter. Ask about activities or hobbies she's interested in and the people she spends time with online or face-to-face. Listen for signs that her interests - and therefore her social group - may have changed by her choice, or listen for signs that she feels left out and left behind by her friends.

Ask how she feels about the changes in her friendships. Tell her you've noticed she's been spending less time with her usual group of friends and you're wondering how she feels about it. Ask open-ended questions to encourage her to share her thoughts and feelings - "How do you feel about spending less time with those friends?" - then gradually ask more specific questions to gauge whether your daughter feels there is a problem  - "Did something happen that changed the friendships?" or "Do you wish you were still close to them?"

Watch for clues about how your daughter is coping with changing friendships. If she becomes upset or talks about being isolated and lonely, then ask her what she would like to do and if she wants your help. Hold off on giving advice or solutions unless your daughter asks for it. Instead, try asking, "Is there anything I can do to help?" then let her answers guide your actions. If your daughter seems interested in other people and activities but says she just outgrew her old friends and needs some time before making new ones, then let her know you're there if she needs someone to talk to. Keep having casual conversations about her interests and social life and offer help if she asks for it.

Encourage your daughter to form new friendships. Even if your daughter enjoys being alone, she might still need some support and encouragement to meet and make new friends. If she's not sure where to start, help her identify her strengths and interests, then look for activities that provide an opportunity to meet people with similar interests. This can help start new friendships and build social skills.

Final Thoughts: Navigating the ups and downs of friendships is hard for many kids (and adults), especially in the midst of physical and hormonal changes and pressure to project an image of the "perfect life" on social media. With support from caring adults, children and teens can learn important social and emotional skills, like expressing their feelings, staying true to their values, and dealing with disappointment or rejection. Although adolescence eventually ends, the importance of having positive relationships never goes away.

This monthly column provides tips for anyone who is helping raise children, based on the world-renowned Triple P - Positive Parenting Program, available to families in Santa Cruz County. If you have a question or idea for a future column, please email Nicole at triplep@first5scc.org.

Nicole Young is the mother of two children, ages 15 and 19, who also manages Santa Cruz County's Triple P - Positive Parenting Program, the world's leading positive parenting program. Scientifically proven, Triple P is made available locally by First 5 Santa Cruz County, the Santa Cruz County Health Services Agency (Mental Health Services Act) and the Santa Cruz County Human Services Department. To find a Triple P parenting class or practitioner, visit http://triplep.first5scc.org, or contact First 5 Santa Cruz County at 465-2217.

 

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  Junior Rangers

(0 A July 2019) Flag_of_California_at_State_Capitol.jpgSanta Cruz Mission: Junior Rangers- History

Date: Every Fri (Jul 11-Jul 25), 11:00am - 12:15pm
Ages: 7-12 Admission Fees: free

Junior Rangers - History Flags Over California,Thursday, July 11, 11am

We'll look at the various flags that have flown over California in history, and learn the story of the pirate whose flag threatened Santa Cruz. You'll get a chance to create your own flag!

Junior Rangers – Flags Over California, Coding, Thursday, July 18, 11am

What do flags and robots have in common? In this fun STEM activity, we’ll examine the ways that ships have used flags for communication and coding over time. You’ll be able to spell your name in flag telegraphy, decipher a secret message, and even code your own robot dance!

Junior Rangers – Mission Life: Play the Mission Building Game, Thursday, July 25 at 11am

Gather around the table to spend Spanish reals, roll the sheep knucklebone, and draw the next card in the event deck. Luck and strategy will determine the success or failure of your mission’s goals.

Space is limited. Register by calling (831) 425-5849 or online. Free event. For more information, call (831) 425-5849. Event made possible by Friends of Santa Cruz State Parks and California State Parks.

Location: School St, Santa Cruz Map Phone: 831.425-5849 •website Santa Cruz West Side

 

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  Rangers Galore!

(0 A July 2019) JuniorRangerandranger.jpgLittle & Junior Rangers Portola Redwoods
Little Rangers: Saturdays and Sundays at 10am; Junior Rangers: Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays at 1pm
Date: Every Su, Fri and Sa

Little Rangers, Saturdays and Sundays at 10am

All 3 to 6 year olds and their families are invited to learn, play, and laugh together at this 30 minute program. Activities, songs, stories, and silliness will help our youngest visitors find a connection to the redwood forest and all of its inhabitants. Adult supervision is required and participation is encouraged. Meet at the visitor center. Free event. Vehicle day-use fee is $10. For more information, call (831) 291-8273. Event made possible by Portola and Castle Rock Foundation and California State Parks.

Junior Rangers, Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays at 1pm

This 1-hour, kids-only program for 7 to 12 year olds inspires the next generation to be stewards of the redwood forest with games, songs, and guided hikes. Become a Junior Ranger and earn prizes while learning how to help the forest! Bring water, backpack, and hiking shoes. Sign-ups begin 30 minutes before the program starts in the visitor center and programs fill up fast! Free event. Vehicle day-use fee is $10. For more information, call (831) 291-8273. Event made possible by Portola and Castle Rock Foundation and California State Parks.

Location: 9000 Portola State Park Rd, La Honda Map Phone: (650) 948-9098 •website

Little and Junior Rangers Butano
Summer kid ranger programs
Date: Every Su, Fri and Sa (Jul 5-Aug 31)
Special Instructions: Littles 10am, Juniors 11am

Little Ranger, Saturdays and Sundays at 10am

Any and all 3 to 6 year olds are invited to play games, listen to stories and songs, and learn about nature! Activities and games vary from week to week, but always cover a topic relevant to Butano State Park. Smiles, laughter, and good times abound at this program, and it’s a fantastic way to begin your morning in the park. Meet at the campfire center next to the Ben Ries Campground. Parents are required to stay and encouraged to help facilitate the fun and games.

Junior Rangers, Saturdays and Sundays at 11am

All visitors aged 7 to 12 have the opportunity to become a Junior Ranger with this program. Junior Rangers learn about the importance of nature and our heritage through exploration, games, and various activities and earn prizes for their participation.

Meeting locations vary; consult the whiteboards at the front kiosk or campground for program location. Free event. For more information, call (650) 879-2040. Event made possible by California State Parks.

Location: 1500 Cloverdale Rd, Pescadero Map Phone: (831) 335-1743 •website Pescadero

Junior Rangers & Little Rangers Henry Cowell
Fun in Henry Cowell Redwoods State Park with a Park Naturalist
Date: Every Su, Mon, Th, Fri and Sa (Jul 1-Aug 31)
Ages: Jr 7-12 & Little 3-6

Junior Rangers, Thursdays, Fridays, Sundays, and Mondays at 10am, Saturdays at 10:30am Do you have a 7 to 12 year old child? This 1-hour program inspires children like yours to be stewards of the redwood forest with games, songs, and activities. They will become a Junior Ranger and earn prizes while learning how to help preserve Henry Cowell Redwoods State Park! Make sure they bring water, a backpack, and hiking shoes. Meet at the campfire center. Parents must sign-in and sign-out their junior rangers. Free event. Vehicle day-use fee is $10. For more information, call (831) 335-7077. Event made possible by Mountain Parks Foundation and California State Parks.

Little Rangers, Thursdays, Fridays, Sundays, and Mondays at 9am, Saturdays at 9:30am Do you have a 3 to 6 year old child? This 30-minute program hour program children like yours to love and connect to nature with games, songs, activities, and goofiness. Meet at the campfire center. Adult supervision is required and participation is greatly encouraged! Free event. Vehicle day-use fee is $10. For more information, call (831) 335-7077. Event made possible by Mountain Parks Foundation and California State Parks.

Location: Campfire Center, 2591 Graham Hill Road, Scotts Valley Map website Felton

(0 A July 2019) LittleRangers.jpgLittle Rangers Natural Bridges

Mondays Mid-June through Labor Day at 10:30am Join us during the summer season for a free 1-hour children's programs for kids ages 3-6 and their families. Weekly topics and themes vary. Previous themes have included: birds, frogs, secrets of sand, plant detectives, and many others!

Location: 2531 W Cliff Dr, Santa Cruz •website• 

Junior Rangers New Brighton

Memorial Day Weekend through Labor Day, Thursdays, Saturdays, and Sundays at 11am
Children ages 7 to 12 are invited to attend Junior Ranger Programs at New Brighton State Beach to explore, practice outdoor skills, and play games. Sorry parents, this is a kids only program! Meet at the Visitor Center for this one hour program. Fee for parking. Receive your logbook and badge, and begin your journey.

Location: Park Avenue off of Highway 1 •website

 

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  Emergency Planning

(0 A July 2019) EmergencyPlanning.jpgCalifornia Mother of the Year Susan Tatsui-D'Arcy is spreading the word about emergency planning!

As California's Mother of the Year, I'd like to make sure that we're prepared to protect our homes, families, and pets as we enter FIRE SEASON. Everyone knows that it's a matter of "WHEN" not "IF" there will be another catastrophic wildfire like we had last year when both northern (Paradise Camp Fire) and southern (Woolsey Fire) destroyed almost 20,000 structures, burned almost 250,000 acres, and killed 88 people. So let's work together to prevent a fire or earthquake from taking out our homes and neighborhoods.

There are a number of EASY things you can do to prepare for an emergency.  I've created an easy checklist anyone can use to start preparing for a disaster.  The checklist is located on the AmericanMothersCalifornia.com website here, and I've also recorded a 30-minute podcast that goes into a lot more detail - you can listen to it here, or find GakkoMom on iTunes and subscribe to my podcast.

Please take a few minutes to read the checklist, or listen to the podcast when you have some free time.  With a little bit of preparedness, you can save precious things - and even lives.

Let's do this! Susan Tatsui-D'Arcy

2019 California Mother of the Year, AmericanMothersCalifornia.com, 

  Fun Events!

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JULY

CALENDAR

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Mount Madonna School

 

Summer Campus Tour
7/11, 10:00am to 12:00pm
Ages: 3 - 18

Parents of prospective students are invited to come for a summer tour. Your child is welcome to join our Mountain of Fun Summer Camp while you learn more about our programs and tour the campus.

Can't make this date?

Call for a personal tour!

408-847-2717

Mount Madonna School

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Reading is a great way to relieve stress! Studies suggest that

 

  • Reading is seven times more effective at fighting stress than playing video games,

  • Four times more effective than going for a walk, and
  • Twice as effective as drinking a cup of tea.

Reading for just 6 minutes can reduce stress levels by 60%

National Reading Campaign, Canada

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Adopted!

Beehive, The 60's Musical
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  Beehive, The 60's Musical
Cabrillo Stage Summer Musical Festival
Date: Every day (Jun 27-Jul 14)
Details: A Cherry Coke With Plenty Of Fizz! "My Boyfriend's Back", "Be My Baby", "Son of a Preacher Man", and "Me and Bobby McGee"
City: Aptos view all details >>
     
Friday Night Bands at the Beach
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  Friday Night Bands at the Beach
Beach Boardwalk
Date: Every Fri (Jun 14-Aug 30)
Details: Bring the family and your blanket or low back chair and join us for these classic bands!
Special Instructions:
City: Santa Cruz view all details >>
     
PopUp Picnics in the Park
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  PopUp Picnics in the Park
Friends of Santa Cruz State Parks
Date: Every Th (Jun 13-Aug 16) from 11:30am to 1:30pm
Ages: All
Details: Enjoy tacos on the terrazza!
City: Santa Cruz Phone: (831) 429-1840 view all details >>
     
California Rodeo Salinas
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  California Rodeo Salinas
California Rodeo
Date: Every day (Jul 18-Jul 21)
Ages: All
Details: 2018 California Rodeo... Cowgirl and Cowboy Up!
City: Salinas Phone: (831)775-3100 view all details >>
     
Kiddie Kapers Parade
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  Kiddie Kapers Parade
California Rodeo
Date: 07/13/2019 at 7:00pm
Details: Bring your family to Oldtown Salinas and join years of tradition with the Kiddie Kapers and Colmo del Rodeo Parades.
City: Salinas Phone: 831-751-3100 view all details >>
     
Teen Glow Night
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  Teen Glow Night
City of Santa Cruz Parks and Recreation
Date: 07/12/2019 from 8:00pm to 10:00pm
Details: Come join us at this just-for-teens glow party on Main Beach! There will be activities and opportunities to win prizes, music, r
City: Santa Cruz view all details >>
     
Composing Together
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  Composing Together
Library Aptos
Date: 07/12/2019 from 3:00pm to 4:00pm
Ages: all ages
Details: Composing Together with professional composers and performers
City: Aptos view all details >>
     
Coventry & Kalusa
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  Coventry & Kalusa
Library Boulder Creek
Date: 07/17/2019 from 11:00am to 12:00pm
Ages: All ages
Details: Coventry & Kalusa present juggling, hula hooping, acrobatics, music, comedy and more!
City: Boulder Creek view all details >>
     
Magic with Perry Yan
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  Magic with Perry Yan
Library Felton
Date: 07/11/2019 from 3:00pm to 4:00pm
Ages: All ages
Details: Magic with Perry Yan
City: Felton view all details >>
     
The Richness of Friends
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  The Richness of Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
Magic with Perry Yan
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  Magic with Perry Yan
Library Garfield Park
Date: 07/11/2019 from 12:30pm to 1:30pm
Ages: All ages
Details: Magic with Perry Yan
City: Santa Cruz view all details >>
     
Composing Together
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  Composing Together
Library Scotts Valley
Date: 07/12/2019 from 12:30pm to 1:30pm
Ages: All ages
Details: Composing Together with professional composers and performers
City: Scotta Valley view all details >>
     
The Richness of Friends
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  The Richness of Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
Full Moon Madness
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  Full Moon Madness
State Park Henry Cowell
Date: 08/09/2019 from 6:00pm to 9:00pm
Ages: All
Details: This astronomy-based evening is perfect for the whole family with kids' crafts, guided night hikes, and a special astronomer gu
City: Felton Phone: (831) 335-7077 view all details >>
     
Helping Children Understand Limits
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  Helping Children Understand Limits
Triple P
Date: Every Th (Jul 18-Aug 8) from 6:00pm to 8:00pm
Details: Attend this 4-week Brief Group to learn:Positive ways to teach your child to accept limits and cooperate with you ...
Special Instructions: Phone: (831) 724-2997 x211
City: Watsonville Phone: (831) 724-2997 view all details >>
     
     
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