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  Santa Cruz Parent Santa Cruz County

January 24, 2019
Family Survival Skills

Dogs, Chores and Homesteading

Moms to the Rescue

Amahl and the Night Visitors

Fun Events!
Click to view our Business Directory
  Family Survival Skills

(0 A January 2019) GoatwithChild.jpgWhat do homesteading, chores and dogs have to do with becoming successful adults? A lot! Read our articles on these and take what fits your family!

When we're talking about "basic survival skills," we usually think about major environmental threats like fire, flood, rain/snow/sleet/hail storms, mud slides, tornadoes, earthquakes, hurricanes, tsunami's or bad guys, auto accidents, sports accidents, etc. We have locks on our doors, go-bags packed, gas tanks never lower than half, phones charged, food staples on hand, generators, etc.

For parents, it's about more likely the stress of daily survival skills, from minor to major, that occupy our thoughts.

I "listen" to local moms talking about daily challenges which exhaust them, try their patience, bring them to tears (and laughter) --children in the temper-tantrum stages, bed-wetting, relentlessly strong willed children, children who don't sleep well, children with special needs or life-threatening illnesses, children with autism, marriages not working out, not enough income, and more. A couple of closed Facebook groups parents can ask to join are Santa Cruz Mamas, Santa Cruz Parents of Sensitive Kids, ADHD or Learning Disorders, Real Moms of Santa Cruz, Free to Be a Mom.

There's professional support from organizations like Triple P, Positive Discipline and SPIN. For more serious, special situations there are many professionals with the skills to help.

Please share our newsletter with new friends so they won't miss a few tidbits of wisdom from our author contributors, and as always our many fun events!

Have a sunny weekend with family and friends!  Parmalee

 

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  Dogs, Chores and Homesteading

(0 A January 2019) Dog_andHisBaby.jpgExecutive Success May Be Influenced By a Surprising Source: The Family Pet

Pets bring joy, companionship and comfort to people's lives every day, but new research found business leaders believe pet ownership contributed to their success. A survey conducted by Banfield Pet Hospital® discovered a correlation between pets and professional achievements: 93 percent of C-suite executives surveyed in the U.S. grew up with a pet, with 78 percent attributing their career success in part to owning a pet as a child. Read more>>>

(0 A January 2019) ChickenandGirl.jpgAmerica's Kids Badly Need a "Chore Culture'

by Annie Holmquist

The other day, NPR wrote a feature article about a unique program at John Bowne High School in New York City. Despite being in the heart of one of the biggest metropolises in the United States, John Bowne runs an agricultural program for upwards of 500 students.

Known as "Aggies," these students "grow crops, care for livestock and learn the rudiments of floriculture, viticulture, aquaculture, biotechnology and entrepreneurship."

According to NPR, such a program is an excellent addition to the high school curriculum because agriculture is a booming industry. The students who participate in the program will accumulate a wide variety of hands-on experience with which they can land a job in the agriculture sector, a job which may even pull their families out of poverty.

But while this is a great reason to encourage such a program, I think there's a deeper reason why more schools - both urban and rural - should consider a similar one. In a nutshell, such a program promotes what one might call a "chore culture," a culture which instills hard work, responsibility, and the knowledge of basic skills which today's society has lost. The article gives a glimpse of what this "chore culture" might look like>>>>>>

Homesteading

(0 A January 2019) ChickenGirlEgg.jpgHomesteaders of Santa Cruz County on Facebook is "a group for all things related to homesteading in the Greater Santa Cruz area. Got goats? Shear sheep? Talk turkey? Raise rabbits? Preserve produce? Create compost? Family farm? Celebrate self-sufficiency? Make a market garden? Practice permaculture? Sale advertisements, bartering, sharing resources, and all topics relating to homesteading locally are allowed."

(0 A January 2019) Book_UrbanHomesteading.jpgUrban Homesteading: Heirloom Skills for Sustainable Living

This book can get you started. "The urban homesteading movement is spreading rapidly across the nation. Urban Homesteading is the perfect "back-to-the-land" guide for urbanites who want to reduce their impact on the environment. Full of practical information, as well as inspiring stories from people already living the urban homesteading life, this colorful guide is an approachable guide to learning to live more ecologically in the city.

The book embraces the core concepts of localization (providing our basic needs close to where we live), self-reliance (re-learning that food comes from the ground, not the grocery store; learning to do things ourselves), and sustainability (giving back at least as much as we take). Readers will find concise how-to information that they can immediately set into practice, from making solar cookers to growing tomatoes in a barrel to raising chickens in small spaces to maintaining mental serenity in the fast-paced city environment. Full of beautiful full-color photographs and illustrations, and plenty of step-by-step instructions, this is a must-have handbook for city folk with a passion for the simple life."

 

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  Moms to the Rescue

Help! I'm feeling incredibly exhausted and desperate for help with my strong willed, spirited daughter. Everything is a struggle. Nothing is easy.

  • (0 A January 2019) Book_BecomingtheParentYouWantToBe.jpg I recommend Janis Keyser book Becoming the Parent You Want to Be and google her she has a site called Kids in the House.
  • They grow into strong , capable woman. The days are long but the years are short. I say choose your battles wisely so you can save some energy and find some time for yourself to pamper you!
  • My sister in laws daughter was TOUGH. Very defiant, bossy, and always screaming. They took this course with an instructor and I swear I don't even recognize the kid. She's a different kid now! They said it was tough to do, and took some time. But the course helped them redirect her energy and strong will into better outlets. Called love and logic https://www.loveandlogic.com
  • My daughter challenges me at every turn. It's so exhausting. I've been trying to read more of Janet Landsbury stuff, her blogs and posts mostly. Listening to some podcasts too. She's wonderful and it has helped a little when I actually apply it. It's so hard to keep your cool when it's your own child and she so knows how to push your buttons. Hang in there!
  • I know how hard it is. I, too, have a spirited child. I read Raising Your Spirited Child and it helped me a lot. But the bottom line is that it is just utterly exhausting. It just is. Happy to meet up anytime if you want a listening ear.
  • Check out positive parenting, there are clinics for free here in town. Lots of good info about how time out can exacerbate problems. My child is strong willed as well. I learned many good techniques/ideas. I don't always use the tools when I should and then after think, darn, that would have been a great way to handle that. but eventually you will get there. good luck.
  • I feel you and hear you so much. I have a daughter that sounds similar and she is now 8. The oldest. She is not usually one to go with the flow. Her plans are always different and sometimes at complete odds with the rest of the family. What you did with your girl is very much in line with what's worked best for us. I am now much better at staying neutral and non-reactive (but not 100% yet!) when she pushes or protests or plays victim. I've learned how to not take it personally, which is always the element I have control over and is the most exhausting part. I took a Hand In Hand intro course and learned the value of listening when she has big feelings, even if I don't see things the way she does. If she's mad at her little brother, I sit with her and listen fully when she rages at how she hates him and wishes he would die. I don't say a lot, just little observations about what she's feeling, and really focus on hearing her. She doesn't need or expect me to agree, she just wants to feel important enough to be heard. Sometimes it takes a long time to get the feelings and the tears out. There are other ways you can connect, such as through play, roughhousing, and laughter. When she can unload her feelings to a safe person, that literally helps her brain discharge that emotional energy and be able to access the part of her brain that uses logic and reasoning and that's where the cooperation comes from. It may take several sessions of this and you'll need to get space for yourself to recover between them. That's just been my experience and maybe it can help you, too. You're doing a great job, mama.
  • (0 A January 2019) Book_TheExplosiveChild.jpg A book that helped me with my willful child (& actually my other kids also) is The Explosive Child I checked it out from the library. I didn't agree with everything in the book, but it was worth the read.
  • I felt defeated when my defiant, ferocious, and challenging daughter was 2 1/2 now three. In a desperate attempt from a fb cry out for help tried the audio book No bad Kids. My husband saw the change that week and listened to it himself. With both of us on the same page with her we saw a lot of change. Of course most of the change came with how we were handling it but consistent unification on how we deal with it has helped a lot. I always try and remember this feisty attitude will help her as a grown woman and it's my job to help direct it and not try and shut it down. It can be soooo frustrating thou. I feel you! I hope whatever avenue you take it's helpful! Plus a momcation might be in order.
  • What a great community this is. I found the "Raising your Spirited Child" book by Mary Kurcinka extremely helpful (others have mentioned it above). We also did some sessions with a behavioral therapist, which was helpful for me (my behavior when my kid is acting out) as much as helpful for him!
  • I highly suggest Hand in Hand Parenting with Amy Sheely she has a beginning class coming up that I took from other instructors and it was really good. I have taken 2 short courses from Amy and her partner Beth and they are really great
  • We are right there, too. These threads are so helpful if for nothing else, to show that is it developmentally normal for some kids and that we don't have to worry about the "why" so much as the "how" we help them (and ourselves) through.

Thank you mamas from the bottom of my heart for all the kind words and advice. The past year I have found myself isolated and afraid to go in public because of others judgment, mine included.  Thank you all for the seeds of hope you have given me. You all have truly brightened my spirit in a way I deeply needed.

 

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  Amahl and the Night Visitors

Amahl and the Night Visitors 

--a perfect first opera for children-is a tale of a disabled boy's generosity, unselfishness, of poverty, temptation, wonder, forgiveness, temptation and a miracle.

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Saturday, January 26
Two performances: 11am & 1pm
Music Center Recital Hall
UCSC Theater Arts Department

UCSC opera students and instrumentalists present Amahl and the Night Visitors, the most beloved of Gian Carlo Menotti's operas. The 50-minute story of the imaginative child, Amahl, and his three royal visitors is sung in English with chamber orchestra.

Admission is free for children with a suggested donation of $10 for adults. No one turned away. Nathaniel Berman conducts, Sheila Willey directs. 

Suggested donation $10 for adults (free for children).
Parking $5. 


Location: 1126 High St, Santa Cruz Map  website Santa Cruz West Side

 

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  Fun Events!
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JANUARY

CALENDAR

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Kirby School 6-12, Shadow Days are Mondays

 

Mount Madonna School PreK-12, Campus Tour and Preview of "13" the Musical1/24

 

Mount Madonna School PreK-12,  "13" the Musical1/25-27

 

Expedition Academy 5-8, Open Studio 1/25

 

Kirby School 6-12, Open House 1/26


Gateway School K-8, Open House 2/2

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The Top 100 Children's Books on Goodreads

for Independent Readers through the Middle Grades

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" Tommy and his sister Annika have a new neighbor, and her name is Pippi Longstocking. She has crazy red pigtails, no parents to tell her what to do, a horse that lives on her porch, and a flair for the outrageous that seems to lead to one adventure after another!"

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Best Buds!

Children's Planetarium Show
click to view website
  Children's Planetarium Show
Hartnell Planetarium
Date: Every Fri (Aug 30-Dec 13) at 5:15pm
Details: Star programs for children
Special Instructions: No late admittance. Be sure to show up 5-10 minutes early. Doors are locked shut at start times.
City: Salinas Phone: (831) 755-6979 view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
Women's Adventure Film Tour
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  Women's Adventure Film Tour
Rio Theater
Date: 01/26/2019 from 7:00pm to 10:00pm
Details: A celebration of the fantastic women around us, and are hand-selected to be enjoyed by people of all ages
City: Santa Cruz view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
Introduction to Positive Discipline 2-Hour workshop
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  Introduction to Positive Discipline 2-Hour workshop
Positive Discipline Community Resources
Date: 08/24/2019 from 10:00am to 12:00pm
Ages: Adults
Details: Will YOU Advocate to bring Positive Discipline to your campus this year?
City: Santa Cruz Phone: 831-476-7284 x107 view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
"13" the musical!
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  "13" the musical!
Mount Madonna School
Date: Every day (Jan 25-Jan 27) from 7:00pm to 9:30pm
Ages: All
Details: You're invited to the high school production of "13" the musical!
City: Watsonville Phone: (408) 847-2717 view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
Wine and Crab Feed
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  Wine and Crab Feed
Burrell School
Date: 01/27/2019 from 2:00pm to 5:00pm
Details: Fresh local crab, homemade clam chowder, fresh sourdough, mixed green salad, and crab cupcakes.
City: Los Gatos view all details >>
     
Beginnings at the Adobe
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  Beginnings at the Adobe
State Park Castro Adobe
Date: 01/27/2019 from 11:00am to 3:00pm
Details: Hot cocoa and stories of this pioneering family and our pioneering park
Special Instructions: Dec 23, 28, 30
City: Watsonville Phone: 831-335-6318 view all details >>
     
With Help from Friends
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  With Help from Friends
Date:
view all details >>
     
9th Annual Whalefest Monterey
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  9th Annual Whalefest Monterey
Fisherman's Wharf Association
Date: Every day (Jan 26-Jan 27) from 10:00am to 5:00pm
Ages: All ages
Details: Ocean-themed exhibits and activities fun for all ages, Whale Watching Capital of the World
City: Monterey Phone: 831-238-0777 view all details >>
     
90 Years of Magic
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  90 Years of Magic
San Francisco Zoo
Date: Every day (Jan 20-Jan 31)
Ages: All
Details: 90 cent admission into the Zoo for children under 14 in January!
City: San Francisco Phone: (415) 753-7236 view all details >>
     
     
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