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  Santa Cruz Parent Santa Cruz, CA

August 1, 2013

22 Things Happy People Do Differently
Lynda and Kidz Backpack Project

Suki: Book Review: Hurrah for a Well Earned Week

Christine: Stopping Mosquitoes...the Easy Way

Lorraine: Refrain from over-helping...
This Week
Monterey Bay Strawberry Festival
More Happiness Practices
Click to view our Business Directory
 

(Photos General) FamilyPhotos.jpgIt seemed like a good project for the summer... going through three boxes of photos, letters, cards, notes from loved ones, mementos like a dance card from teen years, a pressed gardenia that fell apart, home-made gifts from grandchildren. My goal was to "lighten" the amount of "stuff" I was keeping. I didn't realize that reviving the past would be such an emotional roller coaster, eliciting joy, pain, smiles, sadness, but especially a new perspective on relatives and friends as revealed through their letters. I began to know my mother, father, brother now gone for 10 years and grandmother with new insights, more than when I first read their letters so many years ago.  I'm reorganizing the memories into a historical sequence and having a very difficult time throwing out anything.

The entire experience has made me think about the nature of happiness, hence the article below with many suggestions for achieving that state. Remember the adage: do something for 30 days and it becomes a habit.

It happens in all families: we need a breather from our children whom we love very much, but there are moments...  Suki writes about this phenomenon.   Christine is back with a neat solution for avoiding mosquitoes.  Lorraine helps us inspire our children to try and accomplish a new skill.

There's a shocking article about education/cheating/ghost writing cited on the Central Coast Independent Schools of California page on Facebook.  While there, LIKE them so you can receive reminders when new articles are posted.  Their goal is to provide articles from all perspectives in order to provoke thinking!

Happy August, Parmalee

SUMMER CAMPS PARK ACTIVITIES THE WEEKEND
  22 Things Happy People Do Differently

(Photos General) BoyTrains4.jpgBy Chiara Fucarino

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. - Dalai Lama

Happy people have good habits that enhance their lives. They do things differently. Ask any happy person, and they will tell you that they ...

1. Don't hold grudges. Happy people understand that it's better to forgive and forget than to let their negative feelings crowd out their positive feelings. Holding a grudge has a lot of detrimental effects on your wellbeing, including increased depression, anxiety, and stress. Why let anyone who has wronged you have power over you? If you let go of all your grudges, you'll gain a clear conscience and enough energy to enjoy the good things in life.

2. Treat everyone with kindness. Did you know that it has been scientifically proven that being kind makes you happier? Every time you perform a selfless act, your brain produces serotonin, a hormone that eases tension and lifts your spirits. Not only that, but treating people with love, dignity, and respect also allows you to build stronger relationships.

3. See problems as challenges. The word "problem" is never part of a happy person's vocabulary. A problem is viewed as a drawback, a struggle, or an unstable situation while a challenge is viewed as something positive like an opportunity, a task, or a dare. Whenever you face an obstacle, try looking at it as a challenge.

4. Express gratitude for what they already have. There's a popular saying that goes something like this: "The happiest people don't have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have." You will have a deeper sense of contentment if you count your blessings instead of yearning for what you don't have.

5. Dream big. People who get into the habit of dreaming big are more likely to accomplish their goals than those who don't. If you dare to dream big, your mind will put itself in a focused and positive state.

6-22 below!>>>>

  Lynda and Kidz Backpack Project

(Ads 2013) LyndaAndKidzBackpack.jpgLynda and Kidz Backpack Project Needs Just a Few More Donations!

Are you the family to help bring them to their quota!?

Each summer the Lynda and Kidz Backpack Project collect gently used or new backpacks and donations to provide back to school backpacks to homeless and low income children in Santa Cruz County through the Homeless Services Center, Rebele Homeless Shelter, Elm Street Mission and Walnut Avenue Women's Shelter.  Also they provide backpacks to an Indian Reservation through St. Andrew's Church in Ben Lomond and to children suffering with Aids through the Sunburst program in Sacramento.

You can drop backpacks and/or $25 for supplies at The True Olive Connection, 106 Lincoln St, in downtown Santa Cruz or Therapilates, 41st Ave, Capitola or call Lynda to arrange pick up, 831.332.6371.

Lynda Hall, Founder  ~  Lynda and Kidz Backpack Project  ~  831-332-6371 ~ kidzbackpacks@gmail.com  Join us on Facebook

 

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  Suki: Book Review: Hurrah for a Well Earned Week

(Photos General) SukiWessling2013.jpg

In homeschooling circles, what I'm about to confess is something on a par with admitting that you are some sort of non-violent felon. Not as bad as a murderer, though perhaps I'd be put in a category with embezzling CEOs, crooked car mechanics, and guys that steal purses from old ladies.

OK, deep breath, here it goes: I confess that I don't always want to be with my children.

Camp

Not my daughter's camp, but I couldn't resist including a photo of Icelandic ponies!

Phew, that was rough, but I'm glad I got it off my chest. When I walk into the homeschooling conference in a little over a week, the crowd may actually part so that no one has direct contact with me. It's possible that I'll be kicked off the board of the Discovery Learning Center and my children will be shunned at homeschool park days.

But at least I will feel unburdened. It's just a risk I have to take.

It's like this: I adore my kids. I think they're really cool. In fact, like most parents, I think they're cooler than any other kids, at least as far as my own personal definition of "cool" goes... Read more>>>>

Suki Wessling writes about parenting, education, gifted children, and homeschooling.

 

(Ads Camp 2013) CatalystSummer2013.jpg

  Christine: Stopping Mosquitoes...the Easy Way

(Photos General) Animal_Mosquito.jpgI've written about mosquitoes before. Both of my guys attract them. I don't attract them, but they annoy me at times.  Occasionally. . . Mostly I just watch my guys running away from them. I tripped over this article that has an easy solution. Just run a fan. When you are sitting outside, put a small fan that blows air across your seat. Yep - that's it.

Apparently mosquitoes aren't strong flyers, so it doesn't take much of a breeze to discourage them. They can only fly at less than 2 mph. Also, a breeze blows away the good smells that attract them to your body. I wrote about attracting mosquitoes in an earlier blog. When my guys are covered with mosquitoes, I tell them that they have hordes of females chasing them - but it doesn't make them feel better...  Read more>>>>

Christine is a scientist and mom.  You can find more of her essays here.

 

(Ads Camp 2013) OSE_Fun_2013_ad_728.jpg

  Lorraine: Refrain from over-helping...

(Photos General) LorrainePhoto.jpgThis week, refrain from "over-helping" when your child has a task to do. We hate to see those we love struggle and want to jump in and rescue them. I'm inviting you to NOT do it this week. Let them build a little tolerance for discomfort, strengthen their ability to solve a tough situation, and learn the art of finishing what they start. CAVEAT: If your child sincerely needs help, please help her- let her know that you are there for her. But also let him know he can do it (if he truly can) and let him own this life-long skill.


a.  Give your child something to do (age and developmentally appropriate, please)
b.  She is excited because you set it up to be something that will make her more capable and mature
c.  She begins her task and starts to get a little frustrated- she whines and ask for help
d.  You come, observe, comment on how well she is doing, and give one tiny suggestion to get her beyond her upset, or lend a quick hand to get her to the next step
e.  Then you watch, quietly saying, "You're doing such a good job." or "I like how you are doing that." or "That's right, I think you've got it."
f.  Let her be proud as she completes the project herself.

The more we let our children use their own inventiveness to accomplish things, the more proud they will be of themselves; a newly learned and practiced skill will make your child CONFIDENT. And I'm proud of you for taking this Parenting Challenge!

So play with this, email me and let me know how it goes, and keep up the good work! To be ahead in the parenting game become an insider on The Secrets to Safe, Happy and Confident Kids

  This Week

(Graphics) EventCalendar.jpg(Ads) SantaCruzParentCamp.jpgBelow is only a partial list of upcoming events and activities so be sure to click on our EVENT CALENDAR so you do not miss anything >>

Use the PARENT PLANNER to click on events and resources you are interested in and click PRINT MY PLANNER to print or email your list.

 

(BUILT IN) (Icons/Graphics) Title_CampGuide.jpg

Aikido Summer Camp for Kids

August 5 - 9

5 exciting days of Aikido. Beginners welcome.

(Photos General) AikidoSC_Kids2.jpg

  Aikido Santa Cruz

423-8326

Adventure Sports August Swim Classes

(Photos General) AdventureSports_SwimBabies.jpg

Session Dates:
Monday/Wednesday:
August 5th thru August 28th
Tuesday/Thursday:
August 6th thru August 29th

Schedules

(Ads Camp 2013) GrowingUpWild_Camp2013.jpg

Summer in the Parks

(Photos General) Parks_EagleRock.jpg

 

(Graphics) PalaceStufftheBus2013.jpg

(Logos Business) Palace_Logo2013.jpg

(Ads Camp 2013) JaneAddamsPeaceCamp_2013.jpg

(Ads Camp 2013) Seahorse_ad2_20133.jpg

(Photos General) Dog_happyspring.jpg

Sweet smile!

 Monterey Bay Strawberry Festival

City of Watsonville
Strawberries, music, food and strawberries every way you can imagine
Aug 3-Aug 4 from 10am to 7pm
Admission Fees: Free

(Ads 2013) Strawberryposter2013.jpgThe 19th Annual Watsonville Strawberry Festival at Monterey Bay is in downtown Watsonville.

The festival offers activities and contests for all ages,family-friendly atmosphere,arts and crafts and a variety of entertainment including:

"Strawberry lovers will unite for one of Watsonville's premier outdoor events at the Annual Monterey Bay Strawberry Festivalin the historic downtown plaza.

The multi-faceted celebration will serve up a menu of delectable strawberry delights, non-stop live community entertainment for young and old on two stages, gooey contests for berry lovers of all ages, arts and crafts, a special children's area with strawberry projects, Strawberry Carnival, and much, much more.

From fresh strawberries to strawberry tamales, you'll be able to satisfy your strawberry appetite.

Other food items available include tacos, pepper steak sandwiches, Falafels, Greek delicacies, barbecued sandwiches, pizza, sausage, kettle corn and hot dogs."


Location: Downtown Plaza, Main St, Watsonville Map
Phone: 831-768-3240 •website Watsonville

Be Happy
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Movies - Imax at The Tech
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  Movies - Imax at The Tech
The Tech Museum
Date: Every day from 10:00am to 5:00pm
Details: Now Showing at The Hackworth IMAX Dome Theater
City: San Jose Phone: (408) 294-8324 view all details >>
     
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Old Cabin Classic Pre-Run
click to view website
  Old Cabin Classic Pre-Run
Mountain Bikers of Santa Cruz
Date: 04/10/2017 from 5:30pm to 7:30pm
Details: Pre-ride April 10, Registration April 13, Ride May 13 Mountain Biking fun & Rodeo for Kids
Special Instructions: see website
City: Santa Cruz view all details >>
     
Be Happy
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41st Annual Roughwater Swim
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  41st Annual Roughwater Swim
City of Santa Cruz
Date: 08/02/2014 at 11:00am
Details: One mile swim around the wharf!
City: Santa Cruz Phone: 831-420-5273 view all details >>
     
Be Happy
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Make Movies with Teen Tech Tasters
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  Make Movies with Teen Tech Tasters
Library Scotts Valley
Date: Every Sa from 3:30pm to 4:30pm
Ages: all
Details: Making movie tips for teens
City: Scotts Valley Phone: (831)427-7717 view all details >>
     
     
  More Happiness Practices

6. Don't sweat the small stuff. Happy people ask themselves, "Will this problem matter a year from now?" They understand that life's too short to get worked up over trivial situations. Letting things roll off your back will definitely put you at ease to enjoy the more important things in life.

7. Speak well of others. Being nice feels better than being mean. As fun as gossiping is, it usually leaves you feeling guilty and resentful. Saying nice things about other people encourages you to think positive, non-judgmental thoughts.

8. Never make excuses. Benjamin Franklin once said, "He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else." Happy people don't make excuses or blame others for their own failures in life. Instead, they own up to their mistakes and, by doing so, they proactively try to change for the better.

9. Get absorbed into the present. Happy people don't dwell on the past or worry about the future. They savor the present. They let themselves get immersed in whatever they're doing at the moment. Stop and smell the roses.

10. Wake up at the same time every morning. Have you noticed that a lot of successful people tend to be early risers? Waking up at the same time every morning stabilizes your circadian rhythm, increases productivity, and puts you in a calm and centered state.

11. Avoid social comparison. Everyone works at his own pace, so why compare yourself to others? If you think you're better than someone else, you gain an unhealthy sense of superiority. If you think someone else is better than you, you end up feeling bad about yourself. You'll be happier if you focus on your own progress and praise others on theirs.

12. Choose friends wisely. Misery loves company. That's why it's important to surround yourself with optimistic people who will encourage you to achieve your goals. The more positive energy you have around you, the better you will feel about yourself.

13. Never seek approval from others. Happy people don't care what others think of them. They follow their own hearts without letting naysayers discourage them. They understand that it's impossible to please everyone. Listen to what people have to say, but never seek anyone's approval but your own.

14. Take the time to listen. Talk less; listen more. Listening keeps your mind open to others' wisdoms and outlooks on the world. The more intensely you listen, the quieter your mind gets, and the more content you feel.

15. Nurture social relationships. A lonely person is a miserable person. Happy people understand how important it is to have strong, healthy relationships. Always take the time to see and talk to your family, friends, or significant other.

16. Meditate. Meditating silences your mind and helps you find inner peace. You don't have to be a zen master to pull it off. Happy people know how to silence their minds anywhere and anytime they need to calm their nerves.

17. Eat well. Junk food makes you sluggish, and it's difficult to be happy when you're in that kind of state. Everything you eat directly affects your body's ability to produce hormones, which will dictate your moods, energy, and mental focus. Be sure to eat foods that will keep your mind and body in good shape.

18. Exercise.  Studies have shown that exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft does. Exercising also boosts your self-esteem and gives you a higher sense of self-accomplishment.

19. Live minimally. Happy people rarely keep clutter around the house because they know that extra belongings weigh them down and make them feel overwhelmed and stressed out. Some studies have concluded that Europeans are a lot happier than Americans are, which is interesting because they live in smaller homes, drive simpler cars, and own fewer items.

20. Tell the truth. Lying stresses you out, corrodes your self-esteem, and makes you unlikeable. The truth will set you free. Being honest improves your mental health and builds others' trust in you. Always be truthful, and never apologize for it.

21. Establish personal control. Happy people have the ability to choose their own destinies. They don't let others tell them how they should live their lives. Being in complete control of one's own life brings positive feelings and a great sense of self-worth.

22. Accept what cannot be changed. Once you accept the fact that life is not fair, you'll be more at peace with yourself. Instead of obsessing over how unfair life is, just focus on what you can control and change it for the better.

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